When I was a kid Nickelodeon hosted an annual contest in which the winning child won a toy run through Toys-R-Us. The winner got three minutes to run through the toy store and could keep any toys grabbed and shoved in a cart. Usually they’d televise the toy grab showing some raving lunatic kid streaming down aisles raking shelves of toys into carts presumably getting multiples of the same items but reveling in the overwhelming sensation of getting, getting, getting.
In many ways the religious right of late has acted like that crazed kid at Toys-R-Us. The reelection of a “conservative” President with the willing, rubberstamp “conservative” Congress in the aftermath of an exploitable national tragedy has created the perfect storm for them to run through the halls of power and grab things on their wish list since 1952. As much as I can’t stand their agenda I can’t blame them for trying to get, get, get everything they can before DC morphs into a less conducive environment.
But now it seems as though the three minute toy run is almost over. Regardless of whether the Democrats regain control of Congress next November it is already set that the far-right will have a less hospitable body to work with. Their hammer, Tom DeLay, sang his Swan Song this week and their lover (not in any sort of gay way, God forbid) Rick Santorum is behind in Pennsylvania polls by double digits. The Republicans most vulnerable are not those New England Yankees they can’t stand – like Chafee, Specter and Snow – but those standing closest to Bush.
There was much fanfare this week on all the religious right websites about the vote on the Constitutional Ban on gay marriage. James Dobson and Tony Perkins and all the men at Concerned “Women” for America got to go to a Rose Garden ceremony and hear the President say awful things about gay people sure to be frowned upon by history some day. Some of them even had their picture taken with the President. Truly it was a proud moment. Of course, each of these groups spun it as a victory and an example of their political might. But, while their gorilla chest beating might have had some intimidation two years ago, this week it was just sad.
For starters, W pretty much forgot about that whole gay marriage threat after getting reelected. Rove, that brilliant Machiavellian, got the religious right all whipped up into a panic to come out and vote in November but conveniently forgot they existed once promoted to a policy position. Now, the President is below freezing in the poll numbers and efforts to reach out to various constituents under the Republican tent have fallen short. So he broke the glass in the event of an emergency and pushed the big red gay panic button knowing the religious right jackals would circle around him.
This is not a political victory. If a president ignores you while he brags about all the political capital he’s going to spend and only calls you when he has no other friends he doesn’t really care about you. He’s like the boy in college who only called you after getting shot down by every girl he wanted at the party. You’re his convenient frat fatty and the Rose Garden ceremony wasn’t your victory lap. It’s the political equivalent of your walk of shame. You've been used now get up and leave.
The religious right has tried to put a positive spin on the week’s events noting that amendments take years to advance. This is true. Many big bills and especially amendments come up for votes several times as they gradually build toward the super majority needed. But this amendment isn’t doing that. There are more Republicans in the Senate now than when the amendment first came up for a vote yet there are fewer Senators supporting it this time around. They’re not gradually building up support for anything.
And that’s not all. After the 2004 elections Jan LaRue held multiple press conferences where she screamed about Arlen Specter being chair of the Judiciary Committee. And much of the red side of Washington shivered in terror at her theocratic bravado. Now John McCain keeps squirming out convoluted answers as to why he was pictured with her at a press conference supporting cable choice almost acknowledging that was a really bad choice. McCain is less comfortable talking about taking pictures with LaRue than he is discussing his nutty polygamist nephew.
Roe v. Wade has not been overturned. The Supreme Court Justice handpicked and propelled by the religious right hasn’t been voting their bidding. The SD total abortion ban is expected to be overturned by a voter referendum in November. Washington State failed to even get a gay marriage ban on its ballot as did California and a few other states. All the screaming about ending judicial review and banning gay-this and gay-that might have really been a death rattle more than a battle cry. They have to know theIr toy run is almost over and all they good stuff was on the top shelf where they couldn’t reach.
They won’t ever be irrelevant. As long as there are people willing to have every choice dictated to them by those that manipulate religious imagery to get rich and powerful the religious right will have clout. But they won’t always have the absolute grip on their party that they’ve had for about 18 months. And during that time they failed to get their big ticket items passed. Their best hope now is for the President to be involved in another scandal or fumble a national disaster. Then maybe the phone will ring.
